Now, you may think that this is likely to be as insipid, awkward and ill-fated as my last attempt at blogging but oh no!

I have discovered that it is only rarely that I find myself with anything of worth to say and this is usually when I find I have no time in which to write it down. So I have a plan.

Recently, I came upon a long, lost treasure while perusing the inordinate pile of junk that inhabits the underside of the bed in our spare room. Fluorescent, shameless and nestling in amongst piles of unmarked essays, discarded Buffy VHS cassettes and long-forgotten underwear, was The Surreptitious Pink Book.

Some of you will know the book. Some of you will remember the intense and unadulterated pleasure of a few snatched moments of diversion, amid the tedious hours that were atrophied by the discussion of electrons, wave-particle duality and Rectification.

Yes, Rectification. Don’t get excited- it’s something to do with converting AC current to DC. Although we did always think it sounded like something Catholics would ban.

Some of you will recall how the hurried and clandestine efforts to abuse teachers and fellow pupils alike were recorded in the book, its tolerant and all-encompassing pages awash with multicoloured gel pen glory. Okay, not that hurried. We spent quite a lot of time pissing about with that book in all fairness.

But, you see, this is the point. I realised that there was something missing in my life. Yes, I was besieged by sudden pangs for friends on different sides of the country. I was threatened by overwhelming waves of nostalgia and sentimentality, certainly. But I also had an almost forgotten sensation reawakened- and that sensation was this- the immensely satisfying feeling of pissing about with your friends, under the guise paying attention and working hard.

Therefore, I am going to endeavour to recreate that feeling and the book via the magic of the internet web super highway, or, in layman’s terms the internet web super highway. How this is going to work, I am a little unsure.

I should like all of my friends to not only be able to comment but provide things of interest. For example, observations, amusing websites, strange words we should all use more, for example defenestrate, lists, conversations, photos and of course, complicated mathematical equations relating how many magical weightless trees it would take to get to Jupiter, if such trees existed.

Obviously, the normal commenting system may not be up to the job. I am unsure how to proceed. People could email me things or comment and I can place it on the main site content afterwards. I could give out the blogger account details to those wishing to participate so that we can all edit it. Any ideas from those of you blessed with an ounce of technical and computer related gumption?

Nevertheless, I shall find a way for us all to waste time and stay in touch, though opposite sides of the world and engaged in working or studying for a living we may be. Also, I will paste the most entertaining entries from the original pink book, so that we can all see what sort of thing I’m on about and have a good laugh at how very amusing and articulate my eighteen-year-old self was. Oh indeed. I shall be in touch…